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My Son: The College Grad

Charlie Garcia 2

After damn near two decades of day care, pre-school, private middle school, public high school and then busting his butt at the university level, real life beckons my son, Charlie Garcia, as the child I brought home wrapped in a blanket one cold January day 22 years ago, graduates with an Audio Engineering degree from Middle Tennessee State University this Saturday.

I know the economy still kind of sucks, Charlie. You’d be forgiven if you feel a little trepidation about entering the great American work force. But here’s why I know you’ll be alright, son.

I think you were 15 when it hit you; when music became not just a fascination but a passion. When it became a direction in life. And like the good, practical Capricorn you are, you dissected every element of what it would take to live your life dedicated to a creative craft. And you have stuck with it with dogged determination. You can count on one hand, my friend, the number of human beings who get a notion of what they want do with their life at that young an age.

That was about the time we met Alex, a real-life audio engineer working in Manhattan, who agreed to meet with us in Greenwich Village one Spring afternoon and who laid out the not-so-glamorous realities of life in the music business. Wrapping up a recording session at 4am and setting up for the next session at 7am. Making good money mixing rap, even if it was classical quartets that were the true love of his creative life. Ah- compromises.

I remember the portable, digital, recording “studio” I had in my apartment that you used to cut your very first mixing teeth, playing a blue telecaster you would later fix up and own as one of your main performance instruments.

I remember the song you wrote called City Lights, inspired by the twinkling beauty of New York City as seen from the 18th floor of a West Side apartment, a song that appropriately enough, was simply about the joy and angst of writing music.

I remember the young man who in his heart of hearts, wanted to be a record producer but fully understood that to get there, you have to know every aspect of music. You need to write and perform. You need to understand music theory and sound waves and acoustic properties. You need to engineer. You need to edit. You need to mix. You need to manage artists. You need people skills and you need the artistic vision to take your projects from inception to fruition.

And then there is the matter of fear- like that you feel none. Who else meets one of the top music producers in the business at a festival, gets his business card and just a few months later, happens to be in Athens, Georgia, rings him up and ends up sharing lunch with the dude who first recorded R.E.M.. Same with the way you are on stage and performing- no fear. Just tenaciousness…and joy.

This is why, in the long term, you will succeed, Charlie. Because the whole time I’ve known you, if you didn’t have the natural skill, then you worked your butt off to get where you needed to go. Whether it was intense physical training so you could be a goalie on your varsity high school soccer team. Or relentlessly practicing guitar, or piano, or drums or banjo or whatever instrument had most recently made its way into your soul.

And if you needed a little extra cash, you never had any qualms doing honest, physical labor, like tearing down walls and floors for a contractor. Success is not something that has ever been handed you. You have achieved it through sweat and effort. You have never lacked in the area of striving and desire.

I suppose there’s some aspect of genetics that plays a role in creating a young man with such character. But that doesn’t do justice to the effort you put into life every day. I know your incredible mom, Laurie Spencer, who raised you largely by herself while I recovered from one journalistic layoff or another, gets the lion’s share of the credit for the kind of man you’ve become- but even that doesn’t do justice to the fact it’s you who have learned life’s sometimes hard lessons and emerged as a strong, gentle, loving, balanced human being.

I suppose I should get some credit for supporting you emotionally and financially, and, yes, it gives me a measure of pride that you graduate with zero debt to your name. But it has been you who got through the drudgery and the glory of four years of college- growing, challenging yourself, discovering; open to all things professional, spiritual, personal.

So let me let you in on a little secret. Your future is unlimited. Your potential is enormous. But success? You have already earned it. You are already a successful man. And in achieving that, my friend, you have ultimately made me a success as well.

Congratulations, Charlie Garcia.

Notes On a High School Graduation

May 26, 2010 1 comment


I attended my son’s graduation this past weekend in the Atlanta suburbs. Congrats, Charlie! Twelve occasionally anxious years of private and public schooling are making way for four more years of higher education.

Arrival

I have blogged before about how much air travel sucks and, sure enough, having flown maybe 30 times to Atlanta over the past five years I had never experienced what occurred on this trip into Hartsfield. You know you’re in trouble when the wing tips noticeably because it means you are in the dreaded circling pattern waiting to be cleared for final approach.

Being the smart guys they are, the leaders of the airline industry thought it would be a good idea to make hubs out of Dallas, Texas and Atlanta, Georgia, two of the most thunderstorm-prone cities on the planet Earth. Didn’t affect me because Atlanta was my final destination but I felt sorry for all the folks with connecting flights into the now closed Hartsfield airport due to some nasty storms in the area.

We didn’t have enough fuel either. The pilot matter-of-factly informed us we’d have to gas up in Greenville, South Carolina. New one on me. Turns out other flights in the same boat as us were diverted both there and to Alabama for refueling.

To make a long story shorter, we were the first plane in to the humble little South Carolina airport. We hung out on the tarmac for about 45 minutes, fueled up and left for Hartsfield which, gratefully, reopened. We finally landed three hours past arrival time, but thanks to a $91 cab ride directly from Hartsfield to Roswell High School, I made it to the graduation with literally 3 minutes to spare.

The Ceremony

It takes a long, long time to read the names, congratulate and hand diplomas to 500 graduating seniors. Today’s High School students are considerably tamer than those from my generation. If I’m not mistaken, the Herndon High School class of ’74 was the last Fairfax County school for awhile to graduate from Wolf Trap. That would be thanks to one smoke bomb and one streaker. Roswell High’s version of mischief was a beach ball that was let loose upon the sitting and giddy graduates. It was quickly confiscated.

My binoculars and Charlie’s grand-dad’s cell phone camera captured the big moment as my son’s name was called to a nice round of cheering and applause. He had found his place in the mini-universe that is High School. From a nervous Freshman to a confident Senior, he had achieved this right of passage with flying colors.

The Parties and Barbecues

The weekend was spent shuffling from one barbecue gathering to another, congratulating Charlie’s friends, many of whom I had known as 8 and 9 year-olds and now on the verge of life itself with, for most, only a brief 4-year college interlude before assuming true independence.

The final barbecue was at Sean’s house. Charlie and Sean used to be the best of friends and played on the same soccer teams for years. As happens in High School, they had pretty much gone their separate ways but Charlie put in a gracious cameo appearance before heading off for a musical performance at a friend’s church.

Sean is headed for the University of Georgia and loves politics and economics. Smart kid. I swear the conversations I had with him at the barbecue were the most intelligent of any I had with most of the adults over the weekend. As I left the gathering, the poignancy of the moment hit home as I wished Sean luck and told him it had been fun watching him grow up.

Middle Tennessee State- Here We Come

As for Charlie, he’s known for a couple of years now precisely and exactly what he wants to do with life. He’ll be moving on to the outskirts of Nashville, Tennessee to pursue his degree in audio engineering and music production. He doesn’t care about money. He cares about the business and art of music. Period. His heart is so in the right place, I know he will do very well. All I ask is for a small little bungalow on his estate twenty years from now where I can close out my existence typing out my final blog entries about how great it was to have such a kind, smart and successful son.