Garcia Media Life

Who were those guys wearing Redskins jerseys last night at Fedex Field? Somebody call the cops because there’s been a massive kidnapping. About 80 guys pretending to be football players have been abducted and replaced by 80 guys who seem to know what they’re doing.

I know, I know, it was just an exhibition game- the first one, at that. And against a Buffalo Bills team that’s not the greatest club in the NFL-but still. 42-17?

OMG- we have a real quarterback! Two, actually! And old Donovan McNabb; he not only read defenses and completed clutch passes- he had SPEED. He did stuff like outrun defenders.

Back-up Quarteback, Rex Grossman was even better; 61% completetion rate, 2 touchdowns and a 122.5 passer rating. Do you realize both those QB’s have started Super Bowls?

What is going on here?

And unlike me, if you actually have a life and went out on a Friday night and missed the game…you need to know about this rookie named Brandon Banks. His 77-yard punt return for a touchdown was positively electric. It was apparently not a fluke either because he did that sort of thing all the time in college. And Coach Shanahan says the kid is actually a great reciever too.

Ah, Coach Shanahan. Mike Shanahan. I love this man. Not only does he inspire, not only does he know what he’s doing, not only has he whipped this previously sorry lot of a football team into shape…he succeeded in humiliating Albert Haynesworth throughout training camp! That alone makes him my hero. Albert played nose tackle last night, by the way. That’s the position he hates so much he was willing to risk becoming the most villified player in the NFL by dissing his own team most of the summer.

In his post-game press conference, Shanahan didn’t gush for a single second. I may not realize it, but he seems to totally understand this really was just one lousy exhibition game…and he pointed out all the stuff the Skins did wrong in their thrashing of the Bills and somberly stated there’s still a lot to work on. OMG- a ball coach who’s a leader of men!

But wait- there’s more.

We have a defensive coordinator in Jim Haslett who’s a former head coach- and he looks damn well like he knows what he’s doing too! The Redskins intercepted, like, two passes!

And let’s not forget Mike Shanahan’s son, Kyle. He’s the offensive coordinator and play-caller. Dad said he would never hire his son until he had proven himself with other football teams. So the kid took over the Houston Texans offense last year as the youngest offensive coordinator in the game and turned them into the #4 ranked unit in the NFL. At 30, he’s four years younger than Donovan McNabb- but damn if he doesn’t lool like he knows what he’s doing too!

And as for Daniel Snyder, the Redskins owner who presided over the decade-long destruction of one of the legendary teams in football; the guy whose team banned fans from bringing signs to games, sued their own fans in the middle of a recession when they couldn’t pay up for their season tickets, that released blocks of said tickets to web-site scalpers…my I-hate-Dan-Snyder meter is beginning to ever-so-slowly turn toward “ambivalent.” Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would ever turn ambivalent over Daniel Snyder.

Damn. I may have to find a new villain.